Blog

Note: I paused publishing my writings until I had crossed the “age 40” threshold, and though it doesn’t mean that I have a great more deal to say or write, I recognized the need to wait a season or two. I hope to publish more and pray the Lord will help me to communicate the things of Him I see. The following is a journal entry from June 28.

Yesterday morning I got out for a jog. I’m currently camping out at our fireworks stand in Coleman, Texas, so my options for places to run is a tad bit limited if somewhat uninspiring. But, still, training and fitness doesn’t happen on their own, so no matter how inspired or not one has to get up and do the thing. The fireworks stand is located at an intersection, and needing to stay close to the stand I decided to jog ¼ of a mile up the road due west, circle back and then jog ¼ down the southeasterly road. West Texas being pretty flat I could see the stand and intersection if anything needed attention. If my math and GPS worked right that created a 1 mile loop, and if I would complete 5 loops that’s a respectable workout in the warm West Texas climate.

Generally I don’t care for loops (plural). I can enjoy a loop (singular), but doing the same loop repeatedly isn’t what I would choose. Running loops, however, is far better than the alternative of not running at all. So I stretched out and away I went.

I finished 3/4 of the first loop, and in the mass of green a circle of yellow caught my attention. As I drew close, there it was: a sunflower in the ditch. Not a giant seven-foot tall sunflower in a field of sunflowers, but a small, three-to-four-foot sunflower, with one full blossom at the top, about three inches in diameter. In the ditch.

Now, my wife loves flowers, and one of her favorite memories growing up is of sunflowers in Kansas. As I passed by I planned to cut it and place it in my best red solo cup for her to see when she returned to the RV in a few days. I finished the first loop, and had four more to go. Interestingly, the limitation of loops provided me more opportunities to look at the sunflower and think more about it. That’s the beauty of a limitation. It can provide ample room for focusing more deeply and perhaps seeing more clearly.

On the second loop I noticed that the sunflower had several buds that had not yet reached the point of opening up and becoming blossoms. The blossom I saw was not all on its own, but part of a “family” of budding flowers that needed more time before they would be able to open up and reveal their beauty. Everything is made beautiful in God’s time, (Ecclesiastes 3:11), and if I exercised a bit of patience I would eventually see not one blossom, but many blossoms, declaring the glory of God. It’s like that with people. We don’t all blossom at the same time, even if we’re all part of the same family, tribe, or church.

On the third loop I noticed that the sunflower was in the ditch, on the edge of a dried up creek bed. I wondered for a bit about how the original sunflower seed got where it was. A bird? Spring rains? The wind? It wasn’t an intentional act by man, that I was confident of. But it was where it could take root, sprout, and reveal its beauty, all in accordance with God’s creative pattern. God, upholding all things by the word of His power (Hebrews 1:3) planted that sunflower in the ditch. Sometimes as people we can feel like this… our lives feel like a random seed that just ended up in a ditch. Not in a splendidly planned garden, as we might have hoped, but nevertheless, as the Lord planted that sunflower he plants us in places where we can grow and produce fruit and direct glory to Him in doing so.

On the fourth loop I saw a soda can in the ditch near the sunflower. I noted that the soda can was intentionally thrown there, but it wasn’t going to take root, sprout, or produce anything. Isn’t that the way it is? God can bring life from something that appears dead (a seed), and we can’t (a soda can), no matter how hard we try. It reminds me of sowing to the flesh versus sowing to the spirit. Only one produces life. And you get what you plant.

On the fifth and final loop I noticed that there were other, smaller sunflower plants around the big one. They had not produced buds yet but their leaves showed them to be a sunflower plant. One day, left alone to grow, they would produce. The sunflower that had one blossom appeared to be alone in the ditch. But it wasn’t. And we aren’t, if we think about it. The sunflower, differentiated from the other plants by its single blossom is not actually different, just in a different place in its journey of growth. Both plants are abiding in the dirt, and if they continue to do so they’ll produce, (John 15).

I went out for a run again today, and something was a bit different. I noticed that the big sunflower head was now accompanied by another, smaller blossom that was just beginning to open up on its right side as you look at it. So… I’m not going to cut the sunflower yet. Sometimes, you’re better off leaving things alone so that they can grow, rather than cutting them and using them for your own pleasure.

Occasionally a friend will say something that “sticks,” and I’ll ask them to consider writing and developing those thoughts further. This post is one of those. It is reproduced here as given.

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As I conclude my eighth year of homeschooling my children I find myself still at awe with how much I don’t know when it comes to educating them. I think most parents feel this way and therefore feel inadequate to teach and educate their children in the atmosphere of their home. Before I started formal education with our daughter I spent countless hours researching the best curriculum for our family. I hounded my already homeschooling friends with questions to the point where I’m sure they dreaded it! I just wanted to do it right. But what was right? There are so many options out there and so many philosophies that it is daunting and overwhelming.

After our first year of school using a dedicated curriculum and experiencing tears almost daily (my daughter and I took turns) I just thought this was how it was going to be… homeschooling isn’t supposed to be easy, right? Then one glorious day on a joint vacation with dear friends, I was introduced to the Charlotte Mason method. I lost some of you right there. Charlotte Mason was an educator in the 1800’s and for that reason I think her methods have been overlooked today as old-fashioned and out-dated. However, because Miss Mason drew her educational principles from the Scriptures they are timeless and applicable today just as they were then. She believed in educating the child has a “whole person” and that you can’t separate the mind, body and soul to simply educate the mind. The whole child must be educated in all areas of their life via atmosphere (the home environment in which they live), discipline (the methodical and daily ritual of implementing good habits) and life (teaching them of the world in which they live – Deut. 6:6). She believed firmly in giving children a feast of books written about worthy subjects by people who are/were knowledgable and passionate about their topics. All of Miss Mason’s works can be boiled down to 20 guiding principles and I’d like to specifically talk about 2 of them…

The way of the will and the way of reason.

Children (and adults too) must learn and be taught to think “I will” versus “I want”. The motto of all Charlotte Mason followers is “I am, I can, I ought, I will”. I am a child of God, I can do what he tells me, I ought to obey him and by his grace I will. When we see a child who is continually choosing what they want over what is commanded by their parents we call that child a “strong- willed child” but in reality that child is “weak-willed”. They have no self-control over their desires and impulses and have not learned to exercise their will, therefore it is weak. Now just think about what kind of adults those children grow to be. A parents job is to give the child opportunities to exercise their will without extenuating effort on the child’s part. If a child is given a task to do and doesn’t have the will to do it then the parent can give a distraction and come back to the task later – this gives the child the opportunity to try again with fresh resolve to complete the task with his best effort and attention. The way of the will must be exercised by adults too. We have choices every day of what we are going to feed our body and our mind. Do I want to eat cake or vegetables? Do I want to watch my current favorite show or read a book? Do I want to sit on the couch and scroll my favorite Instagram feeds or do I want to take a walk outside? These are decisions that we face every day. We have to choose our hard – either we exercise our will today or we face the consequences tomorrow or down the road. The beauty of helping our children exercise their wills is that we are laying down railroad tracks for them to run on smoothly and effortlessly as they get older. They will face fewer daily will- exercising decisions as they grow up because these good habits will have been diligently and consistently instilled by their parents.

Now for the way of reason… our reasoning or our logic, if you will, still has a seat at the table, but it must be exercised in the correct context. Charlotte Mason’s 19th principle states, “Knowing that reason is not to be trusted as the final authority in forming opinions, children must learn that their greatest responsibility is choosing which ideas to accept or reject. Good habits of behavior and lots of knowledge will provide the discipline and experience to help them do this.” So when the child is working to earn money for something they want to buy their reasoning will tell them that logically if I have $5 and the thing I want is $10 I need to earn $5

more. The child will find trouble and consequences if he uses his reasoning to take that $5 from his brother instead of earning it justly. We see this all over our culture today – “my reasoning makes my actions okay”. Reasoning is justly exercised in the context of things already proven to be true or right but must be guarded against when we have a decision to make with our will. Reason can easily give way to impulse or desire while the way of the will will make right decisions based on truth.

I think we can easily see these principles played out in our culture today. The idea of “my truth is true for me and your truth is true for you” is rampant especially among the millennial and Gen Z generations. I believe it’s the number 1 obstacle to them receiving the truth of the Gospel. If their worldview is based on their reasoning then they cannot allow themselves to see that there is a God, that he holy, and we are sinful and in need of a Savior. It’s so vitally important for us to take seriously the job of raising our children to think biblically as they relate to the world around them – and that starts at home in exercising the will to do right versus their fallible reasoning.

-A.C.

Occasionally a friend will say something that “sticks,” and I’ll ask them to consider writing and developing those thoughts further. This post is one of those. It is reproduced here as given.

“Prayer,” I have heard it said, “is the greatest weapon in the arsenal of the believer.” “Prayer warrior” is the moniker given to those who are experts at its use. They wield this force to the advantage of the Christian army and the results are great. 

I have always struggled with prayer. Kneeling to talk to the Creator of the universe is an intimidating prospect. I don’t feel like a warrior and at times feel like David trying to use the armor of Saul unqualified. Webster’s definition of “warrior” refers to someone who is a brave man or a good soldier. I have always hoped I could become one after years of practice, calling down spiritual fire in an Elijah-type fashion: slaughtering the prophets of Baal like soldiers of Satan, but it never seems to happen. I always seem to find myself struggling with the sin in my life first. 

Maybe I have been going about this thing all wrong. Maybe I’m not a soldier but a son. Maybe the triumphs I am looking for are misjudged. The Bible tells us that the devil is a roaring lion seeking whom he may devour. I can’t kill a lion. In James the Bible tells us that if we resist the devil he will flee from us.  Even the angel Michael didn’t fight the devil in Jude but used the name of God to resist him.  So, what chance have I as a warrior? I am to come boldly before the throne of grace but only to cry Abba, Father. I can’t call fire from heaven because I spend all my time praying to my heavenly Father saying, “Dad, I messed up again, please help me.” 

I have heard men pray over the years and have heard some good ones. They are orators and have the “perfect words.” They can string the words together and it sounds like poetry. I fail at that. They can boldly ask God for great things in a loud voice and do it in Elizabethan English. I stumble over the thee’s and thou’s. 

I have grown up in church and the greatest man that I have ever heard pray is someone who you have never heard of. He was an elderly man in the church I grew up in. I would go over and sit with him on a Wednesday just to hear him pray during the prayer time. Even as a small boy it made an impact on me. The way he spoke to God sounded like he was talking to his oldest and dearest friend. They were simple words from a simple man and to me they were refreshing to the soul. This has always been my personal goal for my prayer life. 

This example shown to a 10-year-old boy didn’t strike me as a warrior but a son talking to his Heavenly Father or as Abraham experienced a friend. I struggle at duplicating this and frustrated when I cannot. As we all do I wrestle with daily devotions and prayer time. Over the years I have started and failed countless times. Every time I fail, I get discouraged and the devil reminds me that I will never get it right. 

Covid has been an interesting experience for us all. It has given us the thing that has always escaped us in the past. Time. We have been forced to have time to ourselves. I think this is what spurred me on in the last couple of years. The excuse of no time was gone. All of my life I watched my dad spend the first part of the day reading his Bible and praying at the dining room table. He made the time in the morning. It got to the point that many times during the day his Bible never left the table but was left there in preparation for the next time. It is possible. So, I made another try. 

On my way in to work I pray and listen to my Bible on a phone app. As I did this something came to my mind. I was praying for the same things in the same order on my drive. I started looking out the window and seeing the world as I prayed, and I found out that I was making “prayer landmarks” on my morning commute. I left my house, and the first part of my drive was praying for my wife and children and their day of school. The next part of the journey was dedicated to our church and then my day at work. Finally, the next part was open for whatever the Lord brought to my mind for requests. This has been the most successful I have ever been a this. 

You might call this repetitive and ritualistic. To those I would say come ride with me and listen. I will even pray out loud. I am infinitesimally growing. It is painfully slow, but it is growth. I look forward and I have so far to go and as I look back my progress seems so pathetically small. Perhaps one day I will take people to their prayer landmark and say, “Here you were prayed for as many times as God brought you to my mind.” 

I slow down when I pray now because it helps me chose my words carefully. I want that time with my Heavenly Father to be special and I want that friendship. I might make it. I will close with this thought that I hade the other day. Conversion took a moment, but completion takes a lifetime. 

D.W.